I’ve seen shooting stars and comets, but never a fireball that swept the arc of the sky with such intensity that it could have been a small, crashing plane, a tragedy, a heartbreak….but was, as I verified the next day, a bit of stardust falling to kiss the Earth…..Since that sighting I’ve had waves of intense anxiety like a dread.

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I could barely move without seizing up and falling over from pain, but I had things to do, so I kept up my schedule until I ended up on the couch, unmoving for 24 hours at which point I had to go out to a dentist appointment. I verrrrryyyy slowly made my way to the car, to the appointment, to the post office. On the way I saw that the tide was high and the waters calm ~ perfect swimming conditions.

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Pay Attention or Pay The Price

But I keep making things harder than they have to be.


It took my back going out yesterday to find the answer: Because I feel guilty for all the gifts that have been bestowed upon me in this life. And I worry that if I dive fully into the world of creative chaplaincy that I see glimpses of, it will reek of selfishness...which is the trait I'm most afraid of embodying.

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The Charlie Chaplincy Institute

Yesterday I was having an imaginary conversation with someone I'd recently met. I was telling this holographic gentleman about how I was going to the Chaplaincy Institute of Maine in the fall. Amazingly, even in my head the word "chaplaincy" was difficult to say. For some reason it doesn't easily roll off the tongue, mine at least.

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